Saturday, August 25, 2007

What I didn't know until I had kids

I didn't make this up, my sweet mother-in-law sent it to me and I thought it was cute. I'll try to post some pictures later today or tomorrow, I'm due some new one.

-How to open a van door while bobbling 2 lunch boxes, two extra coats, a purse, a diaper bag AND a baby!!!
-Why Mom's say no...and Dad's say Yes!
-That solid white socks get lost in the dryer at a much slower rate than do the mates of patterned socks that go with special outfits!
-That one can never own too many sippy cup lids or refrigerator magnets.
-Scientific names of dinosaurs from A to Z.
-That reverse psychology really works.
-The recipe for a homemade play-doh.
-That Duplo and Lego blocks procreate in the night.
-The distinctive sounds of Cheerios crunching underfoot.
-Why they call them Happy meals.
-How far you can dilute juice and still retain it's taste.
-That man (or child anyway) really can live on peanut butter alone.
-Sesame Street's air time.
-That the more my kids learn, the less I know.
-How little sleep a human body truly need to function.
-How many seconds it takes to microwave 4 fish sticks perfectly.
-Who john Jacob Jingle Heimershmitt is.
-How to change a diaper in the dark, in a parked car, on a standing child, and all of these simultaneously!
-Which lines in The Cat in the Hat and If I Ran the Circus can be skipped over without a child noticing.
-How bright a 3 a.m. full moon is.
-The design marvels of hooded towels.
-Velcro-strap shoes and mitten clips.
-Locations of public restrooms all across town.
-Why anyone would bother retracing their steps for miles just to retrieve a lost blankie or pacifier!
-That tigers live in the trees in our backyard.
-The fine art of vacuuming floor without hosing up a Barbie shoe or a Playmobil cannonball.
-Almost every Disney lyric ever penned.
-How to spell amoxicillin, let alone say it.
-The blessedness of naps, the inviolate importance of routines.
-And the one I wanted to add...How much you could love one human being!!!

1 comment:

Erin said...

Amen sister! How funny and sweet all at the same time!